Neon Knights
by Gundam Kaiser
Summary: When Gendo Ikari sent Shinji to live with his aunt and uncle, he made a grave miscalculation - he forgot that they lived in San Francisco. And the Angels know that Tokyo-3 is hiding Lilith, not Adam. Inspired by Nobody Dies and Rebuild of Evangelion. DEAD FIC
1. A Fateful Miscalculation

**Neon Knights**

_A Fateful Miscalculation_

**Summary**: **When Gendo Ikari sent Shinji to live with his aunt and uncle, the magnificent bastard made one grave miscalculation - he had forgotten that they lived in San Francisco. With the Angels aware that it's LILITH rather than Adam in Tokyo-3, well... basically, my interpretation of what would happen if Evangelion took place in the United States. Contains influence and characters from – or shout-outs to – various other anime, manga, etc, whatever I decide is cool. If it gets to be too much, then say so, and I'll try to tone it down, but no promises.**

**Disclaimer: If I owned **_**Evangelion**_**, then why on Earth would I write fanfiction about it? Also, I don't live in San Francisco, but I wish the hell I did.**

**Pairing: Shinji/Mari **

**Rating: T for language and themes.**

**Warning: This story features a (most of the time) consistently well-adjusted Shinji. If anyone's head explodes at the mere thought of such a concept, I apologize. In addition, if you desire a Shinji with overwhelming wangst, this is not your fanfic, and I advise you to find another one, or perhaps read my story "Devourer", which is quite a good deal wangstier. Also, more shout-outs than **_**Nobody Dies**_**!**

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><p>"You want me to <em>what<em>, Ikari?"

"I did not stutter, sensei, nor do I like hearing myself talk, but I will say it again anyway. Take Shinji to his aunt and uncle, let them raise him."

Wondering why the hell Gendo wanted rid of his son, Fuyutsuki enquired as to his former student's reason.

"Even if I _did_ want him raised well, I'm quite aware that I am not the man to do it. You've got some vacation time saved up, right? Drop him off and go to the beach, then."

For a moment, Fuyutsuki was about to ask something, but changed his mind upon deciding that Gendo probably wanted his son as far away from him as possible.

_'I know he's arrogant, but _surely_ he remembers that his in-laws live in San Francisco, right?'_

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><p><strong><em><span>On the outskirts of San Francisco, California…<span>_**

A tall man with long red hair, light scars on his face, and an abnormally large necktie was exercising in his basement, beating the tar out of a well-worn punching bag. His technique looked like a combination of boxing, Kung Fu, and Karate.

When the phone started ringing, he steadied his punching bag, paused Disturbed's "Ten Thousand Fists", dried the sweat from his brow, and said, "Ikari residence, this is Adell. Can I help you with something?"

"_Adell, do you remember me?"_

Pleasantly surprised, Adell happily replied, "Of course I remember you, Fuyutsuki! So, old man, what's going on? I haven't seen or heard from you since Yui's wedding."

Amused somewhat, Fuyutsuki said, _"I'm surprised you can mention that while still managing to sound so upbeat. I thought you hated your brother-in-law."_

Pouring himself a glass of orange juice, Adell said, "Ah, I don't _hate_ him, not really. Sure, Gendo's a grade-A jerk, but my sister loves him, so he can't be a _complete_ bastard. Besides, hating someone I don't really know all that well in the first place just isn't my style."

Chuckling, the older man mused, _"I was beginning to wonder how long it would take you to say that, Adell. Sadly, I'm afraid I haven't called just to kill time, and I need to cut to the chase. Can you and your wife take care of Shinji?"_

A bit confused, the now-seated Adell responded, "Shinji? Yeah, great kid, Rozalin loves him to death. How long are we talking about?"

_"Indefinitely."_

Brow creasing in worry, Adell asked, "Did something happen?"

_"Yes. I'm sorry, but… your sister died three days ago in a work-related accident. I can't tell you anything more than that."_

Leaning forward, Adell softly asked, "A 'work-related accident', hm? When you say you can't tell me anything else about it, is that because you don't know, or because it's classified?"

_"Both. Even if I did have more information, it would probably be the kind that can put me in prison or six feet under for repeating it."_

"I see. And Gendo wouldn't know how to care for a child, even if a book on it smashed him in the face. So I take it you're bringing Shinji here?"

_"I'm at the airport now, and the flight is supposed to arrive in America at nine in the morning, your time."_

Downing his drink, Adell said, "Nine in the morning. Got it. I'm off duty this week anyway, so that actually works out pretty well. Rozalin and I will be there to meet you tomorrow. Oh, and the next time you get a chance, say hi to Gendo for me."

_"Will do."_

After hanging up the phone, Adell nearly shattered the glass in his hand, but controlled himself and set it down gently. Breaking it would serve only to cut his hand wide open, slice through his nice comfy gloves, and make Rozalin worry about him.

Shutting down the stereo and turning off the lights, Adell sighed and went upstairs to the living room, where he knew his wife to be doing paperwork. On his way to the fridge, the blonde, buxom Rozalin looked up and said, "Hey there, I thought you'd still be beating the tar out of an innocent punching bag. Is something wrong?"

Grabbing a bottle of water, he said, "Yeah. Old man Fuyutsuki called."

Concerned, Rozalin went to her husband's side as she asked, "And what happened?"

Eyes in shadow, Adell Ikari hesitated before quietly replying, "My little sister's dead. Some kind of accident at work. That's all I know, and it's all anyone can tell me."

Then, suddenly perking up with a happiness that his wife could easily tell was fake, he added, "On the bright side though, Shinji's coming to live with us, so that's pretty cool."

Just as he got ready to ramble in an effort to hide his pain, Rozalin got up, quickly strode to her husband, and embraced him. "Adell, we promised each other that we wouldn't try to bury our feelings, remember? So… just cry, damnit. Or are you trying to break your promise?"

Grimacing, Adell replied, "I know I promised to be honest about my feelings, but I also promised I wasn't going to make you worry."

Nuzzling her husband's neck, Rozalin countered, "Trying to hide what you feel and think just makes me worry more, idiot."

After a few minutes, Rozalin looked up with a genuine smile and asked, "So, when's Shinji coming?"

Smiling a bit himself, Adell said, "We're supposed to pick him up from the airport at nine in the morning tomorrow."

Frowning a little, Rozalin asked, "Then… I suppose we need to purchase furniture for his room, then?"

Having been raised in the massive household of Lord Zenon of Britannian Parliament, Rozalin was highly intelligent, but even after a few years of marriage to Adell, still somewhat socially awkward.

Also, unlike nearly every other woman Adell had ever known, his wife was amusingly not fond of shopping. Her father's servants had normally taken care of that, and for whatever reason, she simply didn't see the appeal in it that most other women seemed to.

Seeing his wife's discomfort as she subconsciously turned to the side a bit, Adell smiled as he brushed a strand of hair from her face, saying, "Eventually, yeah, but it's not like we have to go today. If you want, I can just take care of it while you're at the park with Shinji or something."

Smiling again, "I appreciate that, but I know that if I sat back and let you do every single thing for me, you actually would. And I, the only daughter of Lord Zenon, will not allow that!"

Chuckling, Adell teased, "You just love mentioning your dad every chance you get, don't you?"

Smirking, Rozalin retorted, "Well, if it weren't for him, you wouldn't have a beautiful, loving, brilliant, and devoted wife, would you?"

"Damnit Rozalin, stop saying nice things about yourself. It means I have to think harder about new compliments." **(1)**

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><p><em><strong>On a high-altitude plane, somewhere over the Pacific Ocean…<strong>_

Shinji blinked at the bespectacled eyes before him. About an hour or so after the plane had left the ground, a girl his age had suddenly appeared in the hallway, spotted him, briskly walked up, got within an inch of his face, sniffed him, and then backed off a few inches before saying something in a language he didn't understand.

All the while, Kozo Fuyutsuki observed, his head tilted in amusement.

She wore a pink shirt with white stripes on it, green-and-white pants, sneakers, had a sleek pair of glasses, reddish-brown hair tied in twin ponytails, and was holding a Godzilla plushie.

Blinking in return, she casually bopped herself in the forehead as she said in Japanese, "Sorry, I didn't realize I was speaking English. My bad! Anyhow, what's your name?"

Hesitating for a minute, the boy replied, "Shinji Ikari."

Tilting her head a little, the girl mused, "Shinji Ikari, huh…. That's a really nice name. My name is Mari Illustrious Makinami. I'm Britannian! Hrm…"

Nervous at the way the girl was peering at him, Shinji asked, "Is there something wrong, Makinami-san?"

Smiling brightly, Mari replied, "You called me –san instead of –chan. Other than that, nope! Huh. You know, Shinji-kun… I like you. You're cute, you're quiet, you don't look like the stupid meanie every other boy I've ever seen seems to be…. And that look in your eyes… It's so adorable! Hey Shinji, let's get married when we're older!"

Completely off-kilter, Shinji could only reply, "Huh? Uhm, okay, sure, I guess…."

Smiling with the radiance of the rising sun, Mari exclaimed, "Great! Let's seal the deal with a kiss!"

And, just before Shinji could open his mouth to try and figure out what was going on, Mari Illustrious Makinami reached up and kissed him on the lips. It was an innocent duplication of what she'd seen adult couples do from time to time, and a second later, she separated her face from his own.

For reasons he couldn't fathom, Shinji suddenly became extraordinarily interested in his seat, trying to make his crimson face return to its normal coloration.

Mari giggled a bit, her own face flushed to a lesser degree, before her father suddenly caught up to her. "So this is where you've been, Mari. I swear – excuse me sir, but could you tell me why my daughter and your son are both red as tomatoes?"

Laughing a bit, Fuyutsuki replied, "My… son? Oh, you must mean Shinji here. You see, there's been trouble with his parents, so I'm taking him to live with his aunt and uncle in San Francisco. Anyway, your daughter appeared out of nowhere, asked proposed to Shinji, and then kissed him."

Mari's father, a tall, muscular – though not bulky – man, gently nudged his daughter to the side as he knelt down to get a better look at the boy.

"Look me in the eye, junior."

Hesitating, but eventually choosing to comply, Shinji did so.

Hrm… He's scrawny, and he's clearly confused and afraid… but despite his obvious fear, once I got him to look right at me, his gaze hasn't wavered since. And I just have this feeling… that someday in the future, this kid's going to be a very important young man. Besides, as scatterbrained as Mari is half the time, there's no way she'll remember this for very long.

"Son, you look like you'll grow into a fine young man. If you and Mari decide you want to get married once you're of age, I'll allow it." Then, returning to his full height, he turned to his daughter and said, "Come now Mari, I understand that you like the unknown, but this really isn't a good place to explore. One place on a plane is practically the same as every other place on a plane."

Honestly having no idea what he should do or say, Shinji was utterly frozen for the remainder of the flight. Once the plane touched down the next morning, however, Mari tracked him down and gave him a parting hug and a peck on the cheek before she and her father vanished into the crowd.

Face turning a bit red again, Shinji turned to the much older man and asked, "Mister Fuyutsuki, do you think I'll ever see her again?"

Fuyutsuki, shaking his head with a stupid grin on his face as he read the papers he'd packed for the flight, eventually brought himself back to reality and replied, "What? Oh, Mari… To be perfectly honest, the odds of you meeting her again in, say, ten years – even if you try to seek each other out – are nearly astronomical. So, to answer your question… probably. In fact, I'd be willing to bet three hundred yen you see her again even sooner than that."

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><p><strong>(1): I'm sorry about the blatant AdellRozalin fluff there, it just kinda… happened. On the other hand, now you have an idea about the kind of parents that Shinji's about to be getting – that is to say, the fun, loving kind that you never saw in ****Neon Genesis Evangelion**** proper, nor in any of the spin-offs. It also helps that they're both very, very badass, so the odds of anything… untowards happening to them is lower than if I gave Shinji to bit parents.**

**Now then, tell me what you thought! Also, the first three people to catch every single reference get a special mention in the next chapter!**

**Finally, if anyone reading this is a fan of _Devourer_, there's a poll for it on my profile - please vote!**


	2. Anachronic Setup

**Neon Knights  
><strong>_Settling In_

**Summary: To be perfectly honest with you all… Given what I've planned for the future, I'm not entirely sure it CAN be summarized anymore… o.0**

**So instead, I'll just give a recap of the story thus far: When Gendo sent Shinji to live with his aunt and uncle, he apparently forgot that they lived in San Francisco. Also, they're Adell and Rozalin of _Disgaea 2_. Then, on the plane ride over, a four year-old Mari Illustrious Makinami kisses the also four year-old Shinji and somehow convinces him to agree to a childhood marriage promise.**

**Disclaimer: I own the scenario. And any original characters/situations/stuff. Otherwise, I don't own it.**

**Pairing: Eventual Shinji/Mari, eventual Rei/?, various canon couples from other stuff that I included in this universe, etc.**

**Rating: T for language and themes.**

**Additional note: Someone mentioned in a review that they were troubled with how calmly Fuyutsuki was handling Yui's death. To be perfectly honest, I can say I'd completely forgotten that he had the hots for her in canon. But since the first chapter gave me ENOUGH trouble writing it the way it is in the first place, I refuse to go back and change it to accommodate that fact. Instead, I'll simply say that in this universe, Fuyutsuki's feelings about Yui weren't nearly as strong as they were in canon, hence why he seemed so unaffected about it here. I'm a lazy bastard, hence why I'm just going to retcon it. **

**Anyway, this chapter begins BEFORE the previous one, and it serves to introduce a couple of other characters who'll be quite important later on. Also, more fun with Mari! Also, I freaking HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE ffnet's stupid formatting. Finally, I'm going with a bit of anachronic order. That is to say, there are scenes in the next chapter that happen before and during scenes in this chapter, but that I wanted to hold off on to get more exposition. When will I resume the plot in a proper way? Who knows? Now then, enjoy the story!**

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><p><em>2002<em>

_Two years ago, there was some kind of explosion in Antarctica that the experts call Second Impact. The continent of ice melted, raising the global sea level quite a lot, and it also shifted the tilt of the world's axis, meaning that seasonal changes are now a lot more regionally intense than they used to be._

_Anyway, a lot of people died in the aftermath. Afterwards, there was a plague in central Asia – the Soviets were pretty much the only country to escape unscathed, half a dozen other countries were totally crippled. Once the plague started to get under control, the Holy Britannian Empire started invading neighboring countries to further expand their sphere of influence and to capture the natural resources found therein. Within a matter of months, dozens of nations had fallen. The Britannians, upon conquest of a nation, would strip that country of its pride and very identity, renaming them as an area with a number. To date, they have subjugated ten countries._

_In an effort to stop the world from completely destabilizing, the United States and the Soviet Union have begun a temporary ceasefire in order to maintain the balance of power._

_However, due to a large number of "brushfire wars" in South and Central America, the United States military is currently tied up in the Western Hemisphere, and as a result, we are unable to aid the Soviets in reigning in Britannia._

_I am an American soldier on the front lines on the Peruvian front. Miraculously, the united forces of the U.S., Canada, and Mexico have thus far managed to pierce through Britannia's allies in a single charge beyond the Panama Canal. The development of mechanized robot suits, called Arm Slaves, is certainly a major contributor – the mobility of a foot soldier, the power of a tank battalion. However, the Britannian forces here have deployed some kind of super-soldiers… humans genetically augmented with animal traits, called Beastmen, and they've been equipped with abnormally powerful Knightmare Frames, and even the most basic Knightmares are on average more powerful than five Arm Slaves of an equivalent generation._

_…_

_So, despite that we've managed to keep going onward, we've pretty much been getting our ass kicked. Of the troops in our division, only Red Team – or, as our CO calls it, 'Team Gurren' – is left. Even without any chance of reinforcements, our team itself has had remarkably few casualties, and Sarge is probably the greatest soldier to have ever lived. Granted, another reason we've made it so far is because of some stuff we found in an ancient ruin a long while back. No friggin' clue how, but they created some kind of piloted robot. The scientists weren't able to figure out what the hell it's made of or how it works, other than that it defies all logic… the mecha is basically a giant face with stubby little arms and legs, and despite that it's ancient, it somehow has technology that's probably thousands of years ahead of what even the Britannians and the Soviets have come up with. Somehow, it appears to have a level of self-awareness, can violate several laws of physics, and actually becomes more powerful when the pilot gets fired up._

_Sarge calls it Lagann, and for some reason I'm the only pilot it really seems to work for._

"Writing in that journal of yours again, eh?"

Startled, the private looked up, quickly stood up and saluted. "Sir!"

Waving off the private, Sarge said, "For the last time, _please_, call me Bro! Anyway, we've got a strategy meeting in a few minutes, so I figured I'd let you know. Oh yeah, according to that CIA guy who air-dropped here yesterday – you know, the guy with a giant forehead and couldn't relax if his life depended on it?"

In the 'at ease' stance, the private replied, "Rossiu, you mean?"

"Yeah, that's him! Anyway, he said that a bunch of rebellions on the continent have actually managed to overcome the Britannian military, and that the war in this part of the world is almost over. Soon as we finish kicking Beastmen ass over here, the indomitable Team Gurren is being sent off to the Middle East. So depending on how those lame-ass commies manage, the war might actually be completely over in a couple of months!"

Resisting the urge to face-palm, the private asked, "Si… Bro, don't you think you're being a little… overconfident?"

Laughing heartily, the commanding officer said, "HELL NO I'M NOT! Where Team Gurren treads, VICTORY FOLLOWS! Our reputation echoes far and wide! When humans and Beastmen alike talk about Team Gurren's BADASS leader, they're talkin' about ME, the MIGHTY KAMINA! JUST WHO THE _HELL_ DO YOU THINK WE ARE, SIMON?"

Smiling at his older brother's enthusiasm, Simon's own spirits began to life as he replied, "We're Team Gurren, sir! THAT'S who the hell we are!"

Smirking, Kamina replied, "THAT'S the way, Simon! Now come on, let's figure out whatever it is we're gonna figure out and then go KICK SOME ASS!"

Smiling, Simon followed to the Operations Tent, genuinely feeling that soon, he could go back home, away from the hellish torment called War.

_One year later…_

The Impact Wars had come to an end a month ago. The United States and the Soviet Union had largely managed to make it through with their infrastructure intact, but the psyche of each country had been forever scarred.

While the campaign to keep South America out of Britannian rule had been a success, America still felt like it had lost. Limiting the Holy Britannian Empire's global control had been more costly than anyone could have guessed.

The decisive conflict of the Western Hemisphere, the Battle of Teppelin City, had been especially brutal. After a few days of siege warfare, Sargeant Kamina Jiha was killed in action. After the loss of their CO and – to many – best friend, Red Team (known informally as 'Team Gurren') had fallen into despair and was reduced to a tenth of their efficiency for the following weeks. A sniper by the name of Yoko Littner took it especially hard, but nobody took the loss quite as personally as Private Simon "The Digger" Jiha, Kamina's younger brother.

The pilot of a physics-defying robot called 'Lagann', Simon went utterly ballistic after having his only family taken away from him and went on a rampage through Teppelin City, utterly destroying every enemy mech in sight and defeating the Britannian commander, Lordgenome, in combat.

After that, however, he had burnt himself out and was not able to fight any longer. Team Gurren, having earned a respite, was returned Stateside and taken off duty for a few months. The Impact Wars had, by this point, been effectively reduced to a battle of attrition between the Britannians and the Soviets over the Middle East.

While Team Gurren was inactive, many of its members underwent therapy for early symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Simon the Digger, in particular, eventually married a woman he met during this time, a civilian by the name of Nia Teppelin.

Three months later, Simon "The Digger" Jiha – later changing his name to Simon Teppelin – would lead a joint U.S.A./U.S.S.R. assault on Britannia's base of operations in Israel and give them a crushing defeat, bringing World War Three grinding to a complete halt.

However, war is hell, and the scars of battle would afflict the hearts and minds of mankind for years to come….

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><p><em>2009<em>

During lunchtime, there is a boy who sits by himself at lunch, and who plays alone at recess.

Eight years old, the bespectacled boy with spiky blonde hair does not have any friends.

He is in some ways more mature than his classmates, being a fan of more teen- and adult-oriented media, and yet is in some ways more childish, being perfectly content to wander about by himself on the playground, acting out his fantasies and carelessly broadcasting them aloud for anyone to overhear.

The boy is considered, by all parties, to be a nerd/geek of the highest order, reading Silver Age comic books and giant robot manga during lunch. His dreams are to become a real-life mech pilot – Arm Slave or Knightmare Frame, he thinks both are equally cool – and to finally figure out who would win between Superman and Godzilla.

In short, he was a lover of the strange and interesting, regardless of whether the subject for the day was humongous mecha, giant monsters, superheroes, swords and sorcery, or apocalyptic space and planetary battles on a scale too grand for most to comprehend.

While the boy would indeed like to have friends, he is not the sort of child who can make friends easily. It becomes even more difficult when considering that he makes no secret of his hobbies, and while they are not looked down upon by society in general for a boy of his age, he just happens to be in a school where 99 percent of boys are more interested in sports, and the girls are interested only in the boys who are _good_ at sports.

The boy would like nothing more than to reach out to someone else his age, but he doesn't know how, not when he is alone in his interests.

Of course, having a peculiar name like his didn't really make things much easier.

After all, what kind of parent names their son _Gate_?

And as the bell for lunch rang, Gate Thompson gathered his Space Marines Codex with his Kamen Rider action figure and went off to put them in his locker. There, however, he found a note taped to it.

_'Walk about during recess if you're interested in the Rider Battle.'_

Intrigued that at least one other person was apparently a fan of Kamen Rider (or at least _Ryuki_), Gate packed up his stuff and went off to lunch, before then heading out to the playground.

After walking around for about ten minutes, as he was passing near the jungle-gym, Gate asked, "Where is that person? Could've at least gave me a way of identifying him."

In reply, he heard one word spoken from above, and quite loudly as well.

"HENSHIN!"

Rapidly turning to face the source, Gate looked up and found a boy his age standing triumphantly upon the jungle-gym, arms crossed over his chest and a gallant smirk on his face.

A face he recognized, after a moment, as the new kid who got transferred from another school in town a few days before. Shinji Ikari.

Greatly exaggerating his voice, Shinji loudly declared, "The heavens cry out! The earth cries out! The people cry out! They cry out for me to punish evil! For I am the warrior of justice, KAMEN RIDER STRONGER!"

Grinning despite himself, Gate replied, "I'd play as an older Rider too, but you picked the only one I know. So in that case, HENSHIN! Kamen Rider Ryuki!"

As Shinji let fly the slowest punch ever seen by mankind, the mock battle began as the two boys let their imaginations run wild.

The principal, who had supervision duty that day, noticed the pair appear to be fighting. Upon realizing just how the two were laughing and making their "attacks" very slow and obvious so that they could be effortlessly dodged, he sat back down though.

As the second grade math teacher came out to take his place, though, she merely saw two boys fighting each other and went out to stop it. The principal, however, held her back. "Can't you see those boys fighting, Mr. Smith?"

Waving away her concerns, he said, "They're not actually fighting, Angel. Pay attention for a minute or two and you'll see they're just playing. It's the same as when other kids play War, except that these two are pretending to be some kind of martial artists instead of soldiers. It's not serious or anything."

At this, Shinji made a very slow, very telegraphed grab for Gate's face, who easily stepped to the side and threw an equally slow and telegraphed punch to the other boy's side, although it was blocked by Shinji's arm.

Confused, the woman asked, "But then why are they moving so slow…?"

Smirking a bit, he said, "My kids play Power Rangers and whatnot all the time, and what Mister Ikari and Mister Thompson are doing looks to be pretty similar. I'm sure you've noticed that despite Gate's quirks, he's actually more mature than a lot of other second-graders. And from what his previous teachers have told me, Shinji's much the same way. They're moving so slow and making their moves so obvious in order to make sure that they don't accidentally hurt each other. I'd guess that within their game, they probably justify it by pretending that they're _really_ moving at normal or even superhuman speeds, but they have extremely advanced reflexes and the entire fight is in bullet time. You know, like in _The Matrix_."

At this point, Gate's knuckle very, _very_ gently tapped against Shinji's forehead, while Shinji's open palm made contact just over the other boy's heart. Shinji, recognizing the hit, leapt back and fell on his rear while Gate made very exaggerated 'spasm' gestures as a result of Stronger electrocuting him, before also falling over and playing dead.

A few seconds after that, though, the two boys got up, laughing, and then properly introduced themselves. "Hey there, I'm Shinji Ikari. I used to go to a different school, but it kind of got wrecked in the last earthquake, so everybody got transferred to somewhere else."

Nodding in sympathy, the blonde boy replied, "Ah, that's gotta suck. I'm Gate Thompson. Never thought I'd meet another kid around here who's a fan of Kamen Rider and stuff. All the other guys are neck-deep in sports, and all the girls are neck-deep in _them_."

Laughing a bit, Shinji said, "Well, to be honest, I do plan on trying out for the soccer team one of these days, but yeah, I'm a big fan of toku shows too. Hey, ask your dad if you can come over to my house sometime. A friend of my dad's has got a _massive_ collection of old toku stuff. Seriously, you name it, Aunt Flonne's got it."

"Say, Shinji, what's your favorite Kamen Rider series? The only classic one I've seen is _Stronger_, and out of the current ones, I've only seen _Ryuki_, _Blade_, _Den-O_, and _Agito_. _Den-O's_ my favorite, followed by _Ryuki_."

"I haven't seen all the classic shows yet, just _Stronger_, _Amazon_, _Super-1_, and _Skyrider_. Out of the new franchise, I haven't seen _Hibiki_ or _Agito_, although I heard it's kind of an alternate version of _Kuuga_. _Faiz_ is definitely my favorite, and _Kabuto_ is second. _Den-O_ was… kinda weird. Yeah, it's kinda good, but I don't see why it's more popular than every other season combined. Oh, next week they're starting a new series celebrating the tenth anniversary of the current series."

With a mile-wide smile, Gate replied, "Yeah, I heard about it. _Kamen Rider Decade_ looks like it's gonna be _awesome_."

The bond of a new friendship growing ever stronger, the two boys continued their chat until the class resumed.

_**GIIIIGAAAAA! SCEEEEEEENNNNE! BREEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAK!**_

This was it. Do or die. Make it or break it. Sink or swim. One decisive blow would end it, one way or another.

This test of courage, skill, intellect, and ball-breaking tenacity was the only thing that stood between ten year-old Mari Illustrious Makinami and graduating the fourth grade.

Glaring at her enemy with a smirk that could make the sun itself turn wary of the beast within her soul, Mari psyched herself up for the battle of the year. Her only tools were to be her hot-blooded willpower, her strategic brilliance, and a number two pencil.

Her enemy was the single most wretched, unholy, madness-inducing abomination since Nyarlathotep itself. With flat skin of unusual texture and a deathly pallor, and eldritch marks of power across its two-dimensional form, this had been the most grueling battle of her life thus far.

She had already come this far, however, and Mari knew just one thing in the depths of her mind.

_This math test is going DOWN!_

Unleashing the full power of her heroic spirit through her vocal chords, Mari declared her purpose to the heavens.

"THIS HAND OF MINE IS **BURNING RED**! THE PENCIL WITHIN IT YEARNS TO STRIKE WITH THE INEXORABLE MIGHT OF **THE PLANET ITSELF**! THEIR LOUD CRIES TELL ME TO CHARGE ONWARD AND UPWARD, THROUGH THE VAULT OF HEAVEN ITSELF UNTIL I GRASP **VICTORY** WITH MY OWN HANDS! **PIERCE THROUGH!** THE VEIL OF _UNCERTAINTY_! WITH ALL MY STRENGTH!"

With a feral grin exposing her teeth and the light of the sun gleaming from her glasses, Mari raised her pencil to the sky as she roared. "TAKE THIS! MY HOPES, DREAMS, AND ALL OF MY SORROWS!"

**"**EEEEEERUUUUPTIIIIIIIIIIIIIING**!"**

**"BUUUUUUUURNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!"**

_**"**AAAAAAANNSSWEEEEEERRRRRRRR!******!"**_

And lo, with this final war cry, Mari drove her pencil at the math test's weak point, the final question, and struck true with the fury of a blazing meteor. And from within the hollowed-out catacombs of that meteor emerged thousands upon thousands of barbarian warriors armed to the teeth and in the name of their pagan gods, they charged with a ferocious cry, carving a path of graphite carnage across the land while the paper terrain beneath wept tears of blood and pulp, screaming for a mercy that would never come.

And while the Tau Empire of Mathematics put up a valiant resistance, by unleashing the power of the WAAAAAGH! and showing their work Da Boyz were able to utterly _annihilate_ the puny math test and then the day was won, and the answer laid out so that all could bear witness to the unspeakable glory and sheer badassitude that had been wrought that day by the hands of a ten year-old girl.

**X = 2.**

Satisfied with her work, Mari raised her hand to signal that she was done, but then realized that everyone in class was giving her weird looks. A sinking feeling in her stomach, Mari winced as she said, "Oh crap… I said and narrated all that out loud, didn't I?"

The other children merely nodded, unsure if what they'd seen was pure awesome, pure lunacy, or both, and the math teacher facepalmed as he wept for the things he was forced to deal with on a daily basis.

* * *

><p><strong>Now then, tell me what you thought! Also, just saying now that Gate Thompson is an original character, but he's mostly inspired by Ginta Toramizu from MÄR (ALL HAIL! SPIKE! <em>SPENCER!<em>). As for his name being Gate… I think it sounds cool. As for why the hell his parents gave him such a weird name in the first place… I'll get back to you on that/explain it in a later chapter.**

**Now then, regarding Mari's scene in this chapter, the Orks and Tau are a reference to Warhammer 40K, of which this Mari is a fan. And no, we are NOT going to have ShinjiAndWarhammer40K-level shenanigans here. I just can't write that much epic. No, she won't usually be that Hot Blooded.**

**... So, can anyone tell me what else got a shout-out in her speech?**


	3. For the Hope of the World

**Neon Knights**

_For the Hope of the World_

**Summary: _Neon Genesis Evangelion_, crossover with _Gurren Lagann_, _Code Geass_, _Full Metal Panic!_, and (elements of/characters from) whatever the hell else I come up with, all filtered through my brain, stuffed in a blender, set on EPIC, and then put on the counter as a milkshake for your enjoyment.**

**EDIT: Given that I keep getting new ideas and inspirations for this, sometimes _by the hour_, I think that I may have actually created a Super Robot War.**

**Disclaimer: I own the scenario. And any original characters (like Gate)/situations (like the setting)/stuff (like the titular Neon Knights). Otherwise, I don't own it.**

**Pairing: Shinji/Mari, eventual Rei/?, eventual Asuka/?, various canon couples from other stuff that I included in this universe, etc.**

**Rating: T for language and themes.**

**More anachronic ordering of scenes this time, though it won't be for too much longer.**

**Now then, this chapter is going to be _heavily_ focused on what's up with Shinji, although Mari gets the obligatory scene as well, as well as the first appearance of another pilot!**

* * *

><p><em>2007<em>

_Knock-knock-knock-knock._

_'Oh god, oh god oh god oh god please let me be dreaming…'_

Rozalin had heard the single most terrifying noise in the world for someone married to law enforcement.

The sound a knock on the door in the middle of the night.

As she sat up in bed, however, she opened her eyes and then blinked. The sun was just beginning to rise over the bay, giving birth to a clear, beautiful sky, a few stray beams of light passing through her window.

Next, she remembered that her husband was off-duty for the current week, and indeed he was in bed next to her, still sleeping soundly.

Then she remembered the night before, and her face went pink. Very, very, very pink.

Shaking her head out of the gutter, she resumed her main line of questioning.

Which is to say, _who the hell was knocking on their door at daybreak?_

A few seconds later, another knock. Not immediately motivated to start moving despite herself, she tilted her head a little to the left. It was odd, somewhat. Almost like a drumbeat with a rhythm of four.

Just as she was about to start moving, the seven year-old Shinji opened the bedroom door and she _almost_ panicked before remembering that she'd had the brilliant idea of putting an oversized shirt on before nodding off to sleep the night before.

Unfazed, the sweet kid in front of her said, "Mom, there're some people at the door. I didn't open or unlock it, but I got a chair to look through the peep-hole. One of 'em looks kinda familiar, I think I've seen him on TV sometimes."

Now tilting her head to the right, she asked, "What did he look like?"

Nodding, Shinji said, "Yep. He was kinda tall and manly-looking, built kinda like Dad. He's got short, kinda spiky blue hair, though it's mostly covered up with a detective hat. He was wearing a dark blue suit, red sunglasses, and he had a smile on his face. It wasn't creepy though, more like a cross between confident, expectant, and… I dunno, hot-blooded."

Thinking for a few moments, she remembered a poltical advertisement and then everything suddenly clicked into place.

_'… "Appearing with the rising sun, a man's man whose hot-blooded radiance burns with such passion for justice, those around him are inspired to turn the wheels of change and the sins of the wicked are illuminated for all to see!" … There's exactly one man I've heard of who fits that description, and he's also the only blue-haired man I know of! But… why the hell is Senator Teppelin at my house?'_

Hearing another patient knock, she sighed before saying, "Go ahead and get yourself properly dressed, Shinji, and then ask them to wait a few minutes. Okay?"

Smiling, Shinji's head bobbed as he muttered a quick "Okay!", before running off to obey.

Smiling in return, Rozalin took a second to reflect on how adorable her kiddo was.

Shaking a few more cobwebs out of her brain, Rozalin shook her husband awake and said, "We seem to have a guest, Adell."

Blearily opening his eyes, he started to get up as well, asking, "Who?"

Finally getting out of her warm, comfy, and _impossibly_ cozy bed, Rozalin replied, "If I'm correct in my thinking, based on what Shinji said... we're soon to be hosting a Senator."

Fully awake in an instant, Adell shot out of bed and, with speed born from years of experience, got dressed in a flash, although his wife was ready to face the day only a second later, having had a head start.

* * *

><p>The drum-like knocking had come every thirty seconds, as though timed on a watch. It gave the impression of… not quite urgency, but something close. Just before the people outside were going to knock again, Shinji went to the door and said, "Everyone's up, Mom'll be down in a minute or two. All right?"<p>

On the other side of the door, Simon 'The Digger' Teppelin said, "That's perfectly fine. In fact, take ten if you need. We've had to wait the last few years for confirmation. I don't believe another little while will matter all that much."

As the California Senator heard little feet run off to report to their master's parents, Simon smiled and tipped the brim of his fedora over his eyes.

The woman with him wasn't his wife, but a friend, and while she was hardly as well-known, she was certainly as important as Simon to the world's survival, if not moreso. An aloof, regal-looking woman in a nondescript military dress uniform with rose-pink hair that went past her shoulders. Ice-blue eyes piercing, she said, "I know they're _supposedly_ not scheduled to start showing up for at least another six years or so, but time is still of the essence, Senator."

Unfazed by his comrade's cool demeanor, Simon replied, "Relax. Remember what we're going to have to ask from these people. This loving American family. Bear in mind the sacrifice we're about to ask from them, and then put yourself in their shoes. Let them have a few more minutes of normalcy, Light. Or do you prefer Commander Farron?"

Averting her gaze, the woman replied, "… Lightning's fine. Look, I'm not proud of what's going on either. You know damn well I'd do it myself if I could –"

"And you know just as well that if _I_ could, I'd not only do it myself, I'd be at the front of the line, as short as it is. But we can't. Quite possibly, this kid is the only one who _can_. God, this entire situation is so fucked up. And for the umpteenth time, call me Simon. … Ah, and now I hear footsteps."

At that moment, Rozalin Ikari opened the door and asked, "What can we do for you, Senator? Madam?"

Simon replied, "Please, call me Simon. Everyone else does. This is an associate of mine, Commander Lightning Farron."

Sighing as he saw the magenta-eyed blonde gaze questioningly at him, Simon continued, "We're here to talk with you and your family. It's about your son, Shinji."

Coming up from behind his wide, the redheaded police officer asked, "And what does our son have to do with anything?"

At this point, Lightning asked, "Tell me something. Are you aware of an organization called NERV?"

Upon hearing the name, Adell stiffened and frowned. "Yeah, I am. My younger sister Yui was a pretty big name in the Japanese branch back when it was still GEHIRN. So what does my son have to do with NERV?"

Brisk and coming off as mildly impatient, Lightning interjected, "I'm sorry, but this is extremely classified. While I'm not against providing you with some of the information you'll doubtless want, would you mind if we continued this discussion inside?"

As the Ikari couple shared a quick glance, they decided that it wasn't an unreasonable request, and allowed their visitors into the two-story house.

Upon entering the door, Lightning said, "Thanks. We'll try not to take up too much of your time."

Once the small group had entered the living room, Lightning crossed her arms as she leaned up against the North wall, which was facing the stairs and had the front hallway to her right. Observing the young Shinji sitting on said staircase with a curious look on his face, she nodded to acknowledge his presence.

Simon, meanwhile, had taken up residence in a wooden chair, which he had spun around and was now sitting in backwards, facing the front door. Rozalin sat on the couch across from Lightning and in front of Shinji, and Adell completed the square by standing across from Senator Teppelin.

Shinji wondered why his adopted mom and dad were so tense, but decided that now would be a poor time to ask.

It was at that moment that Simon asked, "Mr. and Mrs. Ikari… do you believe in aliens? I'm not talking about little green men, Klingons, or Superman, I'm just talking about life in general beyond the confines of our planet."

Rozalin scoffed a bit and replied, "I'll believe it when I see proof with my own eyes."

Adell, however, said that he was open-minded, while Shinji spoke up, "I believe. Why?"

Simon sighed, drawing his blue fedora over his eyes for a moment. "Regardless of what you believe, the truth is that life is out there. We don't know how intelligent or civilized it is, or what form it takes, but the fact remains that xenos exist. They are coming _here_. And they are _not_ friendly."

The Ikari family was stunned into silence for a moment, before Rozalin recovered and asked, "Tell me, senator, where is your _proof_?"

"I'm sorry, but that's classified like you wouldn't believe, and the American government doesn't have the authority to release it to you. Only the Marduk Institute does, and I'm the only member of Congress who knows about this threat. And even if I _could_ show you the evidence, I'd probably still refuse. Take the most horrific thing you can imagine happening to you personally, multiply it by over a thousand, and then apply it to the entire world. That's the kind of thing we're dealing with. Our only advantage is that we have time to try and prepare. Somewhere between six and ten years' worth, that's as precise as we can get it."

Eyes narrowing, Rozalin asked, "While I believe I understand how grave the situation is – according to _you_ – what does that have to do with us and our son?"

Sighing as he stood up, Simon looked them all in the eye as he said, "We have a weapon that can be used to fight the Xenos. In fact, just in case the first ones didn't work, we built a few extras. But for technobabble-related reasons I don't understand… only someone born after the day of Second Impact can pilot it. And then, only around one in a half billion… -ish."

Watching, Shinji suddenly left the room and went to the hall, making sure to hold the door open as Adell strode right up to Simon and asked, "And you want to recruit our son, right?"

Looking the police officer straight in the eyes, Simon answered, "To be blunt with you… yes."

Not speaking, Adell simply grabbed Simon by the shirt collar, pulled him around, and then sent him flying out the door and across the street with a single punch to the face, causing a pretty massive dent in the door of the government car Simon and Lightning had used. "You honestly plan on using a _child_ to fight an interstellar _WAR_?"

Outside, however, Simon just wiped a little blood from his mouth and grinned a bit, before pulling himself up to his knees and stretching his back. Unhurriedly walking back inside, he saw that Rozalin was berating her husband and that Lightning had her hand on an intricate-looking sword. The New Jersey Senator interrupted both as he said, "Look, it's obvious how much you care about your son. Heck, if you _hadn't_ belted me like that, I'd have called you out on it and dragged you into the bay. And honestly, _no_, that is _not_ our plan. We know that the Xeno threat won't arrive for a minimum of six years. The plan is to use that time to help train your son and prepare him. I don't like it either, but there are literally _no_ other options. I know what war is like. Do you honestly think I want to subject a kid to that? Just who the _hell_ do you think I am? But without Shinji's help, the world literally has _no hope of survival_. Unless we prepare now to fight in the future, there won't _be_ another generation to take up our swords later!"

At this point, Shinji spoke up. "Please…"

Everyone looked at him, and saw that he was now standing, his eyes in shadow. "Please, let me fight!"

Raising his head to reveal a mighty resolve burning in his eyes, Shinji added, "Let me fight… for Mom, and for Dad, and for the hope of the world!"

To himself, unspoken, he added, _'And… on the off chance she still remembers me… for Mari!'_

As if to herself, Lightning softly said, "Kid's got spirit, I'll give him that…"

Rozalin was about to object, but Shinji pre-empted her. "Mom, listen. If I'm one of the only ones who can do it, then shouldn't I? You and Dad always taught me that I should try and do what I can to help people. This is my big chance to do just that!"

Grim, Adell sighed before saying, "This isn't a game, Shinji. If you're entirely sure, I guess I'll support your decision, but I'm not sure you can understand how serious this is."

Head bowed over, Shinji paused for a few moments, collecting his thoughts. Quietly, he said, "I remember what it was like… when Yui died and Gendo didn't want me. Even though I don't really hold it against him all that much since he sent me to live with you, it still hurt. That pain… I remember it very well."

Raising his head to look at everyone, Shinji said with finality, "The aliens are just going to make people suffer like that, right? … I don't want anyone… anywhere, _ever_… to have to feel that kind of pain ever again! And if I can keep the hurt away by fighting… then how could I not?"

Simon could've sworn he saw Shinji's eyes glow green, if only for a second. _'This kid… Shinji… heh, even if Evangelion Units 03 and 04 won't respond to him, he just might be the one who can do it. The pilot for the alternative…'_

Rozalin and Adell looked at each other for a few seconds, before the latter let out a low, bitter chuckle. "I guess we might've raised our son too well."

Smiling sadly, Rozalin agreed. "Even so, I suppose there's no helping it now. Shinji, know that whatever happens, you'll always have our support. Now that you've committed, however, you can't just back out later – I, the one and only daughter of Lord Zenon, will not allow it!"

Upon seeing the slight face that Simon and Lightning made at the mention of the Britannian noble's name, she scratched the back of her head and apologized. "I'm sorry, it's a force of habit. Just comes out every now and then."

Adell added, "Shinji, I just have one piece of advice for the moment – of course I'll have more later on an as-needed basis, but this is the most important right now – whatever you do, never ever lose sight of your reason for fighting. As long as you can remember that promise, you'll be just fine."

Nodding, Shinji replied, "I know, Dad. Keeping promises is just our style, right?"

The room was filled with brief laughter from Simon and Adell for a moment, while Rozalin merely chuckled. Even Lightning cracked a small smile.

Bringing the mood back to a more fitting atmosphere, Adell asked, "So then, Senator, Commander… what exactly is your plan?"

As Simon went to look through a window, he noted that the streets were still miraculously empty at the moment. Turning back to his comrade and to the Ikari family, he grinned as he replied, "Instead of telling you, why don't we just show you?"

_At NERV…_

After a brief ride to the Golden Gate Bridge, Lightning had revealed a hidden keypad among the base and punched in a twenty-three digit code.

With a small *beep*, part of the structure gave way and opened the path to an underwater tunnel. "C'mon. It's a short walk from here to the transport."

Eyes widening, Adell asked, "You guys have an underwater base?"

Her tone aloof but not cold, Lightning replied, "Despite the difficulties involved with construction and maintenance, this approach was actually a great deal more cost-effective than trying to create a base beneath the city proper. Even Simon 'The Digger' Teppelin agreed that this was more efficient. It's also more secure in the event of a severe earthquake, being further from the fault line."

His face the picture of awe, Shinji muttered, "This is so _cool_…"

A hint of warmth creeping into her voice, Lightning said, "Glad you're impressed. Now then, a bit of fair warning, everyone – speak a word about anything you see beyond this point and you will be promptly shot. Let's get moving."

Glancing at his wife, Adell muttered, "I don't know which is scarier – that she threatened to shoot us or that she was so nonchalant when she said it."

Smiling nervously, Rozalin replied, "I'd say the latter, given that it sounded like SOP."

The group was enveloped in an awkward silence for the rest of the trip, until the walls of stone came to an end, and the quartet was now within a glass tunnel, surrounded by the vibrant blue ocean. Once again completely amazed, Shinji said, "This is so _cool_!"

Rozalin asked, "It is, but I'm rather curious about how you people managed to build all of this in secret."

Without looking back, Lightning answered, "Does it really matter?"

Eyes narrowed just a bit, Adell shot back, "Not in the long run, but it kind of makes me wonder about what _else_ the government may have been doing with our taxes that we're not aware of."

The rose-haired woman at the front immediately turned and said, "I understand your concern, but actually, half of our budget is provided for by the Marduk Institute, and the other half is from private donations."

By this time, the group had caught sight of a massive offshore base – NERV HQ. It was a magnificent thing – completely averting one's expectation of a city in a dome, but it still looked quite reasonable for an underwater superstructure.

"This is Bay Tower Base. Onto the hangar, then…"

Almost before Shinji realized it, the journey was over. He, his parents, and Lightning were standing before a black and clearly incomplete, but nonetheless humanoid-looking robot.

_'Holy…! I thought Arm Slaves were big, but this thing takes massive to a whole new level! It's gotta be as big as a Pyramid!'_

Turning to the prospective pilot, Lightning asked, "So, Shinji, what do you think?"

Observing the monstrosity before him, Shinji said, "It's kinda scary, but at the same time, it's… IT'S SO COOL!"

A faint smile on her regal face, Lightning said, "To defeat the Xeno threat, the various branches of NERV around the world have been constructing these artificial humanoids. NERV-Japan gets to name everything for some reason, and have classified this type of mech as an Evangelion."

At this point, two men entered the massive hangar from a stairwell to the left. One was wearing an expensive-looking black suit, looked vaguely Britannian, and had three peculiar white stripes on one part of his black hair. The other was in much more casual wear, in jeans and a hoodie, though with a lab coat overtop, his face in shadow.

The hooded man said, in a rough and aggressive tone, "Doctor Alexander J. Mercer. Head of the science department. Now then, I take it you're the kid? … You look pathetic, but if you're what we have to work with, then so be it."

Holding back Shinji's irate parents, the other man said, "Sorry about that, but Mercer's a pretty big jerk to _everyone_ he meets until he decides they're worthy of respect... Commander Farron and Senator Teppelin are the two to reach that distinction faster than anyone else, at two and five years respectively. Actually sweet in comparison when his younger sister Dana's around, though."

Having calmed herself, Rozalin asked, "And just who might you be?"

With a cold and yet slightly manic grin, the man began to introduce himself. "A fair question, miss, and I suppose it deserves a fair answer. I'm Death the Kid, Chief of Operations at NERV-USA. I must say, you seem to be perfectly symmetrical, Shinji, was it? Congratulations!"

Having briefly clapped his hands in joy, Kid continued, "Now then! This beast here, to be precise, is Evangelion Unit-03. We need you to get in the cockpit, and then we're going to see if this thing can actually turn on."

Alarmed, Rozalin asked, "Wait, _what_? You shanghaied our son into piloting a robot that may not even _work_?"

Pausing for a moment, Kid turned back with a puzzled expression and asked, "Senator Teppelin didn't mention that? Could've sworn he was going to…"

At this, Mercer's voice came over the intercom: "You were too busy ogling that 'divine, god-given and oh-so criminally perfect symmetrical' eight-ball to tell him."

Turning back to the window a few stories up where Mercer was, Kid shouted, "AND YOU DIDN'T BRING IT UP?"

With an arrogant smirk, Mercer shot back, "I get paid to do _my_ job, not _yours_. Taking on a workload beyond what's assigned to me would have been…."

Smirk turning into a full-blown grin, he finished, "_Asymmetrical._"

Tired of having his passion for symmetry mocked for the umpteenth time that day, Kid took out his sidearm, aimed at Mercer, and emptied the magazine into a three-inch thick sheet of bulletproof glass.

Adell palmed his face as he asked himself, "Are there _any_ normal people in here?"

Having heard it as a serious question rather than a rhetorical one, Kid replied, "There's Lightning – sorry, Commander Farron – and Subcommander Cid Raines... possibly some of the bridge crew… and I think that's it. Aside from the aforementioned two, no, not really anyone of importance anyway. Oh yes, and possibly you guys."

At this point, the martial arts master deadpanned, "Oh great, this day just keeps getting better and _better_…"

At this point, Death the Kid sincerely apologized for the lack of communication before sending up Shinji in a plugsuit to the Entry Plug.

_Three hours later…_

Exhausted from moving about the massive complex and tiring out his brain trying to 'sync' with Evangelion Units 03 and 04, Shinji sat on a couch in NERV's break room. It was grey, big enough for half a dozen people of average size to sit comfortably, and was comfy to the point of madness. Falling over onto his side, Shinji said, "I love this couch. So very much. If I loved it any more, I'd try to marry it."

On either side of him were his adoptive parents: Rozalin, resting his head in her lap; and Adell sending a pretty strong glare at Doctor Mercer. "Turns out neither of your weapons would activate. So what now?"

Carelessly brushing aside Adell's hostility, Mercer replied, "To be honest, I kind of expected this. Aside from the schematics, we don't really have a damn clue how the bastards work – and NERV-Japan continually keeping us locked out of the loop isn't much help either. So after finishing the Evangelions – built with U.N. funding – we decided to make our own attempt. Soon as your brat wakes up, we'll have him try it out too. Oh yeah, and he can get out of that plugsuit now, only the Evas need it."

With that, Mercer left as suddenly as he'd arrived, harshly shoving someone out of his way. The shoved person came in, however, and was a short, slightly balding man of middle age, though he seemed to be very kind. "Sorry about him, everyone. I'm Doctor Leo Shishioh, and I'm in charge of Project NK. And the robot we made in that directive… well, we actually know that this one works, promise. On the other hand, it has special properties that we think your son will be able to draw out."

Upon seeing the skeptical glares that Adell and Rozalin sent his way, he quickly added, "Of course, I imagine that all this has been quite a shock. While I can pretty much guarantee that this won't be nearly as much of a strain on the boy as the Evangelions were, naturally he should take this chance to recuperate for a bit."

Pausing for a moment, Adell eventually asked, "I know I'm tempting fate here, but you seem to be a pretty normal person. Do you have any actual _answers_ about what's going on?"

Sighing, Dr. Shishioh replied, "Sorry, but I was told not to disclose any further classified information unless your son can unleash the hidden powers of NK-01, the John Henry."

Raising an eyebrow, Adell parroted, "NK-01?"

Rozalin added, "John Henry?"

Nodding, Leo Shishioh replied, "That's right. As someone may have mentioned, we've constructed two types of machines to fight the Xeno threat – the first, which you've seen so far, are Evangelion Units 03 and 04. The other, built with America's own funding, has been designated as the Neon Knights. So far, only the first has been completed: Neon Knight Zero-One, which we've nicknamed Jonh Henry since it's main weapon is a hammer. Neon Knights Zero-Two and Zero-Three are also in the works, depending on how your son does with Zero-One."

Frustration abating now that they were being appeased, Adell and Rozalin glanced at each other before the latter asked, "I believe we're beginning to get a clearer picture here, but… is there any special reason why this second type of mech was given that designation – _Neon Knight_?"

Embarassedly scratching the back of his head, Leo replied, "Well, someone over at Section 2 – that's our intelligence department, sort of like the Secret Service 1.5 – is a pretty big fan of Black Sabbath and, upon hearing that particular song, _Neon Knights_, play during a planning meeting, suggested it. Senator Teppelin, decided that it sounded cool, while Commander Farron nor Subcommander Raines pretty much said 'whatever' and just went with it."

Sweatdropping, Adell said, "…I see. So let me get this straight: the fate of America – along with the rest of humanity – is in the hands of a bunch of crazy people with a gigantic military budget. Am I right?"

Shifting a bit uncomfortably, Leo replied, "Weeeeeell… sort of, yes, but they employ a lot of normal people to help get the job done and rein things in."

Sighing, Rozalin muttered, "Ah, it figures."

_In Zero-One's cockpit..._

After a brief nap to recuperate from the various shocks and stress of trying and failing to sync with the two Evas at NERV-America, Shinji had gotten into the cockpit of the first so-called Neon Knight. The machine resembled an Arm Slave – specifically, the M-9 Gernsback – scaled up until it was comparable in size to an Evangelion. Zero-One's armor was evenly distributed across its frame, which meant that it had no particular weak spot. While neither of America's Evas had yet been tested due to lack of a suitable pilot, John Henry was said to be of comparable strength, speed, and durability based on the data collected from Eva Unit-00 in Japan. Of course, a pilot with a high enough sync ratio could easily increase the speed and power of an Eva, and that machine class also had the AT Field as an advantage. However, the Neon Knights were not to be without their own points, as they had a far superior power source, and John Henry was equipped with a mighty hammer.

Slightly frustrated, Shinji asked, "Okay, so do I have to think at this one too?"

Over the intercom, Doctor Shishioh replied, "Not exactly. The Neon Knights mostly require manual control, although your emotional state can still cause a power surge and a boost in performance. This is because it's powered by a system we call the GS-Ride, which is somewhat akin to a nuclear reactor but without the risks. At the heart of John Henry is a rare type of mineral that was found some time ago, called G-Stone. G-Stone is normally inert, but when placed in the vicinity of sentient life-forms, it begins to radiate energy according to their emotional state, with courage and extreme willpower producing the most output by a dramatic degree. The produced energy, for reasons we've yet discover, doesn't travel in rays like every other type, but instead it moves in a spiral. Appropriately, its unofficial name is simply Spiral Energy. This phenomenon is actually capable of warping the laws of physics within a given area."

Thinking hard for a few minutes, Shinji said, "The part about energy making reality do weird stuff sounds familiar for some reason…"

Smiling a bit, Shishioh replied, "That's because Senator Teppelin's personal mech, Lagann, is capable of doing the same things. From what we can determine, Lagann is also powered by G-Stone, and contains over ten times more of it than is found in the rest of the entire Western hemisphere. Conservation of mass and energy are both rendered irrelevant within the space affected by Spiral Energy, and the impossible becomes possible… such as a bar of steel snapping under a weight load _ten thousand times_ what it should normally take, or a projectile retaining its momentum _long_ after it should have come to a complete stop. It's our theory that _any_ machine, when fueled by Spiral Energy, could produce enough power to smash through an AT Field by means of brute force. Of course, the G-Stone only produces Spiral Energy when utilized by a human with sufficient courage and willpower."

_'Courage and willpower…'_ Shinji thought.

_'Hrm… that's basically what it takes to be a hero, right? So then I just need to act in the most heroic way possible… Who are the most heroic people I know of/have met?'_

As a few images came up in his mind, Shinji asked himself, _'What would Mr. Teppelin do? What would dad do? What would the Mighty Morphin' Red Ranger do? What would Kamen Rider Stronger do?'_

As he thought about it and considered the answers, Shinji grinned to himself.

And then, softly, he spoke, although his volume steadily increased as did the excitement he was deliberately invoking.

"So you're the first of the Neon Knights. Zero-One. Or should I call you John Henry? I don't know if you can understand me, but Earth is in danger. And the hope of the world rests firmly on _our_ shoulders. I can try, but I know I won't be able to keep it up on my own. And that's why I'm asking you, John Henry, to _join_ me. In the name of mankind, let us _fight_ the evil aliens that are coming to purge us from the universe! Together, we will stand against the forces of darkness, you and I. And united, we will emerge VICTORIOUS!"

At this point, he was all-out shouting with a manic grin. "JOHN HENRY! BORN OF STEEL AND BUILT BY HOPE! FIGHT ALONGSIDE ME FOR OUR FUTURE! My name… is Shinji Ikari! With our strength, let's wipe away the tears of mankind and pave the way for a brighter tomorrow!"

At the bridge, the man monitoring the readings reported, "G-Stone is reacting... holy hell! The only one to try it so far and get a reaction anything like this has been Senator Teppelin!"

With a triumphant roar, Shinji yelled, "WAKE UP! JOHN HENRY! AWAKEN AND BEAR WITNESS TO THE BIRTH OF EARTH'S MIGHTIEST HERO! ON THIS DAY IS BORN THE **KING OF BRAVES**! JUST WHO ON EARTH…. _**DO YOU THINK WE ARE**_?"

As John Henry rose from its kneeling position to stand up, it bellowed toward the sky with a metallic roar of its own.

The champion of humanity had been decided.

And the die was cast.

* * *

><p><em>2005<em>

In an underground Britannian base, First Prince Schneizel asked, "Well, chosen one? Do you have what it takes to realize Britannia's destiny as the saviors of the world?"

A four year-old Mari Illustrious Makinami stared back at him, before an apathetic scowl appeared on her face.

_'Is _this_ why they made us come all the way to Pendragon? I mean, meeting Shinji-kun on the plane to San Francisco was _awesome_, but I don't wanna deal with this crap. Stupid royal grown-ups… Heh, more like _royally stupid_ if you ask me…'_

"I couldn't care less about Britannia and what the world thinks about it. I like Mama's country better."

Trying very hard not to let his exasperation with the merely _half_-Britannian girl before him show, Schneizel was about to try another tack when First Princess Cornelia interrupted him. Having observed that the girl appeared to be a bit of a tomboy, she tried appealing to Mari as if she would a boy of similar age. "To make it really simple, we know that there are evil aliens coming sometime around ten years from now, and we want you in the giant robot to beat the crap out of them when they get here. Of course, we have to finish building it first, but we should still to teach you how to drive it until then."

Mari paused and thought for a moment, before turning to look at the massive war machine before her. It was easily the size of a skyscraper, and while it was far from complete, she could still determine the basic design from the shell around it. It was four-legged, and would probably have wheels instead of spider-like legs, which Mari thought would've been really, _really_ cool. The torso was thick and bulky, and the head was roughly triangular. The left arm became a lance at the elbow, and rather than proper fingers, the right hand had wickedly cruel claws.

Upon deciding that it actually looked pretty badass, Mari turned to the Britannian royalty with an arrogant smirk and declared, "If that's all, then hell yes I'll pilot it! Shanking aliens for the hope of the world and Shinji, woo!"

Glancing at each other for a moment, Cornelia and Schneizel at once wondered, _'Who the hell is Shinji?'_

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, in NERV Germany, a young redheaded girl was running down the halls to the psych ward of the infirmary, the world's biggest smile on her face.<p>

_'Yes, I got selected! I just _know_ Mama will recognize me now!'_

As she neared the special door, the little genius was unable to contain herself as she shouted, "Mama, Mama! They picked me to be the pilot of Unit-02! I get to help mama save the world, aren't I lucky?"

As she threw the door open, however, her smile shattered, all the joy behind it gone.

"Ma… Mama? I… I don't understand, Mama…"

As a young doctor with dull blonde hair and perpetually shadowed eyes walking by, he went to see what was wrong, only to grimace and avert his eyes upon looking through the door.

Still swinging on her makeshift noose was Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu, having hanged herself with her bed sheets, her face frozen into a mad grin, but with no sign of life in her eyes. That accursed doll had been shoved in her shirt, so that the noose was around both of their necks at the same time. Kyoko's arm was stained red, as she had apparently found something sharp enough to cut it with, and upon the wall was a message written in fresh blood, using giant letters.

With a small utterance of various profanities, Doctor Johann Faust VIII collected himself and picked Asuka up off the floor, intent on taking her somewhere else in the compound – anywhere else, really.

Muttering to himself in English, the German doctor said, "A weapon that consumes the mind of its creator, then letting its pilot find her mother like this… Accidental or not, I can't believe the things a little girl has to go through for the hope of the world's survival."

A frown on his slightly feminine face, he involuntarily shuddered as he took a final glance at the last sentiment of the Second Child's mother.

_DIE WITH ME ASUKA_

* * *

><p><strong>Damnit, I actually cried writing that last part. Someone give this kid a freaking hug.<strong>


	4. Reunion

**Neon Knights**

_Reunion_

**Summary: _Neon Genesis Evangelion_/_Rebuild of Evangelion_, crossover with _Gurren Lagann_, _Code Geass/R2_, _Full Metal Panic!/Fumoffu!_ (haven't decided on whether or not I'll include _The Second Raid_ yet), some light _GaoGaiGar_, and (elements of/characters from) whatever the hell else I come up with, all stuffed in a blender, set on EPIC, and then set out as a milkshake for your enjoyment.**

**Disclaimer: I own the scenario. And any original characters (Gate) /situations (the nature of this particular Megacrossover) /stuff (the titular Neon Knights, though obviously not their designations). Otherwise, I don't own it.**

**Pairing: Shinji/Mari, eventual Rei/?, eventual Asuka/?, various canon couples from other stuff that I included in this universe, etc.**

**Rating: T for language and themes.**

**Finally, the end of the anachronic order!... I think. Although scenes will still hop about a bit, since the action itself FINALLY starts in the _next_ chapter. Or at least, it's scheduled to. Also, some people are probably going to question some of the things that Mari says and does here, in particular given that she's still a kid. My first answer was long and complicated, but to summarize it, she's just extremely abnormal and therefore often does abnormal things. Ultimately, this chapter is still world-building, though.**

**Also, if you see **

**[this]**

**Then that is where the soundtrack kicks in, and the following scene is best accompanied by the specified music in [brackets]. It doesn't happen this chapter (except as the "credits" music after the omake) but I thought I'd put this note here for future reference.**

* * *

><p><em>2007; NERV-Berlin, Germany<em>

The bespectacled man swiveled around in his chair as he asked, "Are you sure about this, Pilot Sohryu? The procedure is not only irreversible, but it hasn't even been tested on animals yet. If you undergo this, there is a very real chance that you could lose your humanity."

The child said, "I'll still be able to pilot the Evangelion, right? That's all that matters, then. What do you care, anyway? Don't tell me you're actually passing up a chance to cut someone open and experiment on them."

Twisting the massive screw that had been bolted into the side of his head, Doctor Franken Stein blandly replied, "That's not necessarily the case. However, most people heavily frown upon any sort of medical procedure with the goal of transhumanism, even moreso when it hasn't been proven yet, and even moreso when performed on a child that has yet to complete her development."

Her tone monotonous, Asuka said, "News flash, doc: I came to you. My goddamn life isn't worth anything as it is. Aside from that goddamn mecha, I don't have a reason to exist. And if your theory is correct – that any augmentations made to the pilot can transfer to the Eva as a result of the synchronization – then by all means, experiment on me. If your procedure can make me more powerful, then don't hold back."

In order to insure that security wouldn't incarcerate his ass, Stein asked one more time, "So I take it then, that I have the consent of Asuka Langley Sohryu to begin a procedure that not only involves surgical replacement of various body parts with advanced mechanical substitutes, but also to begin an extremely painful chemical treatment which should mutate the patient's physiology in order to vastly increase bone and muscle density, improve the subject's control over their own nervous system, alongside various other nasty things that could be considered analogous to torture with regards to the mind-breaking pain that may potentially be caused?"

Just as the other doctor began to open his mouth, Asuka interrupted him. "If you're going to tell me just how much of a bad idea this is, Faust, then shut it. I don't need a lecture on transhumanism from a goddamn necromancer. Stein, you have my freely given permission to transform me into a modified human."

Sighing, Johan Faust VIII replied, "Just for that, I'll see that you get one later. But no, I was just going to advise that you accept the anesthetic. That way, you'll –"

"No. I'll take the pain with the rest of it."

"Why? I swear, whether it's training, your education, or anything else, you always insist on doing things the hardest way possible! Why won't you just take the easy way, even once?"

A small part of her touched by her friend and guardian's concern, Asuka allowed a small smile to grace her features as she said, "Why, you ask? I will tell you exactly why I always do things in the most difficult way I can."

Her expression becoming one of grim resolve, she continued, "My entire life, up to this point, the people at NERV have been telling me that I am the best. That far and away, I am superior to anyone else with the potential to pilot. And I accepted that. I accepted it and just rode through on that alleged superiority, and then mother died. And then I learned the truth about Eva. I learned about the sacrifice that mother had to make for greatness, so that this disgusting world might have a chance at survival. And so I, too, will make a sacrifice for greatness. To protect those who are supposedly 'inferior' to me, I will sacrifice this perfectly working, flawless body for a more powerful one. If I must cast aside my emotions to gain greater control over my own movements, then so be it. Even if I should have to throw away my very soul, I would do it without hesitation. I will make any sacrifice that is asked of me in order to surpass mother's legacy. Why am I so obsessed with this, then? Tch. Someone's got to do it. Given I'm the one who's lost the most to Eva so far, I might as well take that and run with it. If I can become stronger through suffering, then there's no sense in making some other poor sap go through with it too."

Bowing his head in respect of Asuka's viewpoint, Stein had her strip to her undergarments and then lay on the cold, metal operating table.

"Johan, give me a hand with this."

With a reluctant sigh, Faust handed Stein the needle and solution before powering up a device off to the side.

Within seconds of the first injection, Asuka felt like her muscles were being on eaten from the inside out, like her blood itself had begun to boil.

That was when Faust administered an intense electrical shock to increase the strength of the numerous drugs that were being used.

For five days, the injections, shocks, and surgeries continued.

And through it all, Asuka Langley Sohryu refused to scream or cry out in pain, even once.

* * *

><p><em>2009; Bay Tower Base – NERV-San Francisco, USA<em>

After having become the official pilot of NK Zero-One, informally designated John Henry, Shinji and his parents had been escorted throughout various other sections of the base – partially so that in the event of an emergency, the young pilot would at least have a general idea of where to go, but most importantly to introduce him to the other staffers he'd be mostly working with.

Having first stopped by the infirmary, alternately called sickbay and/or the medical bay, Major Death the Kid presented the group to a brown-haired Japanese man with glasses and a pleasant smile. Making hand gestures to indicate who was who, Death said, "All right you three, this is our chief medical officer, doctor Shinra Kishitani. Shinra, this is our new pilot, Shinji Ikari and his parents, Adell and Rozalin."

Extending a hand to each of the Ikari clan, the good doctor said, "It's a pleasure to meet you all. So then, Evangelion pilot, or John Henry? Despite the speed with which it travels the rest of the base, news is usually pretty slow coming this way."

Shinji replied that he would be piloting the Neon Knight, while his mother Rozalin asked, "I'm sorry if this comes across as rude, but please tell me you're a normal person."

Though his simile never falter, Shinra hesitated just long enough for the Ikari parents to groan. Eventually, he abashedly said, "Well, I'd like to think that I'm at least relatively normal… compared to Major The Kid, certainly. But compared to the mean social norms of humanity…. Erm… Supposing that Subcommander Cid Raines is a one and Major The Kid is a ten, I guess I'm around a four on the abnormality scale. Still, it was a pleasure meeting you all. Oh yes, and Shinji, you'll need to have a physical scheduled."

As the Ikari family and their guide left the infirmary, Adell said, "You know, despite what that guy said, he actually seemed to be… you know, all there in the head."

Nodding, Death explained, "Well, I can tell you that he's certifiably mad in his own way, but not only is he an extremely competent doctor and surgeon with experience in numerous fields of medicine, his craziness is both harmless to other people and doesn't have anything to do with work anyway, so he counts as effectively normal for purposes of NERV. Now then, I've got three other people to introduce you to – two of whom Shinji's marksmanship and close-range combat instructors. After that, since your son has just become highly important to the survival of mankind, you all get a bodyguard. She's among the best in the business, and one of her skills is being unobtrusive in her client's daily life, kind of like a ninja in the movies. So it'll basically be business as usual right up until someone tries to make a move against you, at which point she comes out of nowhere and kicks their as-ymmetrical behind."

Having dodged the proverbial bullet from Shinji's parents by quickly correcting his language, Death led the group towards the gym, where they found an attractive woman with dark blonde hair, torn jeans, and a black button-up sleeveless vest dismantling and cleaning an assualt rifle.

Having heard the door open, the woman stopped what she was doing and sat up, turning to look at the others.

Pre-empting the Major, the woman extended a hand and a kind smile as she said, "I'm Aya Brea, resident firearms expert. So I'm guessing that you're the new pilot that Senator Teppelin said might join us?"

Nodding, Shinji shook her hand and replied, "That's right, I'm assigned to John Henry."

"I see. And you two must be his parents, am I right?"

Adell was the next to shake Aya's hand, and he said, "That's right, although I am kind of surprised that nobody's said anything about my wife or I. Not that I'm complaining, but how exactly are we authorized to even be here in the first place?"

At this point, Death the Kid said, "Allow me to explain that. You see, the reason that you and Rozalin are permitted to be here… is precisely because you are Shinji's parents, and that reason alone. Regardless of what you see in cartoons and anime and such, children are rarely able to keep secrets from their parents. Oh, I don't mean trifles like 'I have dirty magazines hidden in my sock drawer' or 'I go to the bathroom to smoke cigarettes in school with my buds', I mean important secrets, like the giant underwater base you're in, or the eventual invasion by extraterrestrial lifeforms."

Aya continued, "Most children would crack under that kind of pressure and spill it to their parents the moment it was too much to handle alone. Even if the child managed to keep him- or herself together, the majority of parents are not idiots, and can figure out the gist of it on their own. Rather than mess with the headaches that could spring from situations like that, the Commander decided that should we have a pilot-in-training on our hands below a certain age, we'll just get the parents involved as well from the get-go. Kid has ready emotional support from mum and dad, parents don't worry themselves to death fretting over the strange secret their kid's keeping from them."

Nodding, Rozalin said, "That's quite sensible, and it's rather considerate of Commander Farron."

Smiling softly, Aya replied, "Yeah, the Commander's not really one for secrets. Of course, we do what we can to make sure that sensitive information remains well-protected, but secrecy for its own sake will just piss her off. It's probably the biggest difference between her and that guy at the Japanese Branch, Commander Ikari."

Suddenly pausing, she hesitated before asking, "You wouldn't happen to be related, would you?"

Adell replied, "Brother-in-law. Although I don't hate him, we're not close at all, so he won't be getting any information from us."

The rest of the day was spent in a similar manner, essentially Shinji's orientation through the base, introductions to the staff he'd be primarily working with, and some preliminary training, after which the Ikaris were returned streetside, an unmarked black car waiting for them. Rolling down the window a few inches, the driver said, "Pleasure to meet you all. I'm your bodygaurd and Shinji's driver to and from the base."

From what Adell and Rozalin could see, the woman wore a well-pressed black suit and opaque sunglasses, her hair tied up under a hat. **(1)**

Rozalin asked the woman her name, but was met with silence. Resigned to a somewhat awkward ride home, Shinji and his parents got in the car and attempted to digest the situation that they were now in. After about ten minutes, Adell sighed and said, "Well, I guess I'd better ask the Chief to see about reducing my shift a bit."

Then, he smirked and said, "After all, I've gotta teach my boy how to kick giant alien butt."

Rolling her eyes but smiling all the same, Rozalin asked, "One favor, sweetie?"

Mildly surprised, Adell said, "Sure thing, what is it?"

Leaning to the side and hugging their adopted son, the buxom blonde teasingly replied, "Just don't let our baby turn into a battle maniac, 'kay?"

Shinji tried to get away from the fierce embrace, groaning, "_Mom!_"

* * *

><p><em>2012; NERV-Pendragon, Britannian Empire<em>

"On August 10 of four years ago, our great Holy Empire of Britannia sought to bring proper civilization and advancement to Area Eleven, an island on the far side of Asia. While the pitiful Elevens attempted in futility to cling to their antiquated ways, the gap in power was such that our mighty Empire conquered their land within a week. Now then, are there any questions?"

The Britannian history teacher looked over his class, not really having wanted to open the door he just had, but doing his job nonetheless. And, right on cue, a brown-haired eleven year-old girl with glasses shot her hand up and gave him a murderous glare.

Sighing, the man was tempted to ignore her, but on the incredibly off chance that it wasn't what he expected, he called on her anyway. "Yes, Mari Illustrious?"

Almost faster than the eye could see, her open palm became a fist and slammed down onto her desk – and today, she did so with enough force to make a spiderweb crack across the laminate surface. Her tone as respectful as she could manage, yet still openly furious, she demanded, "For the last time you douchebag, it's not Area Eleven – that country's name is JAPAN! The people are Japanese, NOT ELEVENS! And just where the FUCK do you get off calling us antiquated primitives when we were no more than four years behind the Americans in terms of technology, and we were catching up fast! AND FOR THE LAST TIME, MY NAME IS NOT MARI ILLUSTRIOUS! **IT'S MAKINAMI!**"

Reacquainting his palm and face for the day, the professor replied, "I'm sorry Miss Illustrious, but I am only authorized to teach the approved curriculum, and that states that whatever its people were called prior to colonization is irrelevant, because it's Area Eleven now, and its people share that name. Secondly, you will not use such language in my class, and if you do, I'll have you suspended. Even if you prefer your alternate name, you are officially registered as Illustrious, not Makinami. Finally, if you want to change what we teach, then why don't you go and take it up with the Emperor himself?"

At this point, Mari yelled out, "Fine then, I think I'll do just that! I'd rather be suspended – no, scratch that, expelled – than have to deal with your MOTHER-**FUCK**-ING BULLSHIT **BRAINWASHING**!"

His patience having worn out, the teacher roared, "MAKINAMI, OFFICE, **NOW!**"

Despite the problems she'd just created for herself, Mari could only smirk. Instantly switching her expression from berserker fury to sarcastic glee, she smugly remarked, "Yes sir, you wannabe slaver. I just want you to remember this day, teach. I want you to remember, until you die face-down in a gutter from AIDS, that on this day, you – a Britannian professor – lost to a Japanese schoolgirl. Thank you, fuck you, the star is out of here!"

Rising from her seat and storming out of the classroom, Mari forced herself to keep her head high. Inside, she thought, 'One day, I'll show you bastards what it feels like to have someone else violate your country's very soul.'

So caught up was she in her vindictive thoughts that she couldn't see where she was going, and walked headlong into another student three years older than she was. The other boy sneered and said, "Well if it isn't Little Miss Eleven."

_'… … … … … To hell with this.'_

Without missing a beat, she growled and drove her knee into his groin, causing him to instantly fall to the ground, writhing in pain. Not anywhere near finished, she kicked him in the face, dislocating his jaw and knocking a few teeth out.

As the boy got to his feet, he attempted to swing a punch at her in self-defense, only for Mari to effortlessly sidestep, open her mouth, and then bite down hard on his wrist, before driving her knee into his crotch once more, before giving him a series of four kidney punches, a left hook to the face, and then while the jerk was dazed, she removed her glasses before violently head-butting him into unconsciousness.

Then, the headmaster arrived. "Just what is the meaning of this, young lady?"

With a scowl, Mari hotly replied, "Bastard called me… that word. I'm in a decent mood after beating the history teacher today, so I went easy on him."

Eyes narrowing in suspicion, the middle-aged, wiry man replied, "If he called you something offensive, then you should have come to the faculty. Speaking of which, just what did he call you anyway? Which word did he use?"

Glaring in fury, the eleven year-old shot back, "Which one do you think? The one that goes between ten and twelve, of course."

Exasperated, the principal was about to speak when she interrupted him.

"Hey, words can seriously hurt, you know! How would you like it if I called you an uncle-fucking, kitten-raping, bleep-sucking pedophile who only works at a school so he can go full-pervert on all the little kids?"

The principal's response, after a lengthy pause, was to ask, "Just how on earth were exposed to that kind of subject matter in the first place, to go about throwing accusations like that?"

"Why the hell do you care? You're just a Britannian. Stupid assholes, all of you. I swear to God, the only decent Britannians I've ever met are freaking Schneizel, Cornelia, and Euphie. And those other two around my age that disappeared to somewhere, can't remember their names. There's no way in hell they're related to that fat bastard on the throne."

Enraged beyond reason upon hearing an insult to Emperor Charles zi Britannia, the principal slapped her and demanded, "Watch your tongue, half-blood!"

Smug, Mari replied, "So kind of you to acknowledge your superior, you thug. Clearly that extra half-Britannian in you all makes you more prone to breakdowns. That's three of you pure-bloods I've physically or verbally smacked around today."

Here, her face lit up with a dark smirk as she sarcastically gasped and asked, "Can you just imagine what I'd be capable of if I didn't have my Britannian half holding me back and destroying my potential?"

Forcing himself to regain a semblance of calm, the principal snarled, "You, child, do not appreciate the natural order of things."

Her counterattack already at hand, Mari shot back, "Of course I appreciate the natural order of things! The problem here, teach, is that the Britannian way of doing things IS IN DEFIANCE OF NATURE!"

Brushing it off, the man replied, "It doesn't matter what you think one way or the other, I suppose. The Emperor decides what is accepted as natural in Britannia, and you do not. In other words, child, what you believe is irrelevant."

Though she refused to show it, those five words cut deeply into her.

Though the principal did not realize it, he had stumbled upon a weapon that, against Mari, could be extremely effective and damaging.

A single tear fell from her eyes, and any remaining semblance of maturity vanished as she struggled to think of a comeback, uncaring of what it might be, knowing only that she had to somehow respond to such an affont, and therefore she blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"YOUR MOTHER IS IRRELEVANT!"

Mari sat in Provisional Eva Unit-05's Entry Plug, giving her not-quite-friends-but-at-least-relatively-decent-enough-acquaintances Cornelia and Schneizel a recap of her day. In Mari's eyes, they had the slight virtue of – despite still being pro-Britannian/anti-everything-else racists – treating her with respect and making it clear that neither of them really gave a damn about the whole thing, just following along with the order established by The Emperor. Assholes on paper, as it were.

Cornelia slapped her own forehead in exasperation, muttering about how much of a handful Mari was when her temper flared, while Schneizel dispassionately offered, "While I realize that your feelings may have been hurt, you are the one who put someone in the hospital. Furthermore, haven't you realized that your open and unrestrained defiance of all authority only reinforces the majority belief that your people are uncivilized barbarians?"

Sighing, Mari said, "Look, I'll admit that I went a little overboard and that my anger management skills aren't worth a rat's ass-"

Cutting in, Schneizel added, "Your tendency towards foul language excessive for your age doesn't help either."

Glaring at the aloof Britannian, though without the hatred she reserved for most others, Mari continued, "_aren't worth a damn_, but I don't openly defy all authority – just the racist punks that make up 95% of the Britannians I've met so far. Which is really damn weird, since the only open-minded Brits I can remember meeting are you two, Euphie, and those two other siblings, whatstheirnames. You know, Marianne's kids?"

Turning to the ground, Cornelia reminded, "Lelouch and Nunnaly."

Frowning a moment, Mari said, "Yeah, it's a total shame your dad had their mom killed and then shipped 'em off to JAPAN."

When the royal children didn't correct her with regards to Japan's designation or about her pet conspiracy theory, Mari's expression softened a bit as she continued, "They seemed to be pretty chill about this crap – heck, out of all you royal brats, they were probably the ones I would've rather seen ascend to the throne. Seemed like they probably would've changed this craptastic empire of yours into something worthy of respect. Now it probably falls to Euphemia. Still can't believe an utter monster like Emperor Chuckles had as many nice kids as he did, much less a psuedo-messiah like Euphie. Or even apathetic kids, in the case of you two. No idea how the hell you're related to that fat bastard."

Narrowing his eyes, Schneizel said, "Even if you don't care for your Emperor, one would think that you'd know better than to speak ill of a friend's father in the presence of said friend. Particularly when the father of said friend is also the Emperor."

Shrugging, Mari said, "He's not my Emperor. I'm a citizen of Japan until I decide otherwise, and I shouldn't have to respect a ruler who does a crap job of ruling. As for your supposed relation to Chuckles, I don't see what the big deal is. I mean, even if he actually somehow is your father, I've never once heard either of you call him dad. And if you actually had, then it'd be another story, and I might not rail on him as much. … Nah, I'd still rail on him just as much as now, I just wouldn't do it in earshot of you guys so much. But since there's no apparent emotional connection, then as far as I care he's your glorified babysitter."

Eyes twitching, Schneizel could only say "Mari Illustrious Makinami, you are certifiably insane."

Exaggerating a blush, she replied, "Aw, really? I was hoping you'd notice one of these days."

Then, Mari offered, "You know, if my utter madness is really that big of a problem to you guys, you could always have me and Unit-05 transferred over to the States. You get me out of your hair, I get a government I can respect, and your hated enemy the Yanks get to deal with a crazy person."

Suspicious, Cornelia said, "You've brought that up literally every single day since Unit-05 was completed, without failure. Why do you really want to get out of Britannia so badly?"

Rolling her eyes at the duo on her screen, Mari sniped, "Gee whiz _Batman_, let me see: 1) your country pretty much anally raped mine to death and then threw a frat party on the broken corpse, 2) racial discrimination and segregation are not only official policy here, but are treated as moral responsibility, particularly when I define myself as part of a racial group that is extremely discriminated against, 3) I literally hate every living creature on these islands that I have so far encountered aside from you two, Euphie, and the late Marianne and her kids, 4) the feeling's pretty damn mutual. From there, looking at it from a practical standpoint, the Angels are predicted to arrive in either Tokyo-3 or in San Francisco. Logically – though why I use that word in the presence of Britannians who aren't Schneizel, I couldn't say – it's only common sense to put a self-confessed Blood Knight with an Angel-killing superweapon closer to where the Angels are supposed to land. If the Angels land in Tokyo-3, I'll be way closer to where the action is and can get there to help out sooner. If they show up in San Fran, I'm pre-equipped and located to kick some ass. But my final, and above all most important reason, is deeply personal and therefore _not one whit of your goddamn business_."

The last part had been uttered with a much fiercer tone than Cornelia and Schneizel had been accostumed to even from Mari, and ultimately decided to leave that particular issue alone.

With a plastered-on smile and an overly sweetened voice, Mari mockingly concluded, "I think that's everything, mmkay?"

* * *

><p>That very same day, <em>the entire Pendragon NERV branch<em> worked to make sure that the transfer papers were filed quickly and appropriately.

Turns out that as badly as Mari wanted to get out of Britannia, Britannian wanted even less to do with Mari.

Emperor Charles zi Britannia had dealt with enough harassment from that little girl, and given how stupidly close the UN was keeping watch on the Children, he couldn't exactly deal with her as he would an ordinary citizen.

'Damn that Gendo Ikari… how on Earth did he incur enough favor with the Instrumentality Committee to get them to completely overlook how he's been brainwashing that Ayanami girl? Hmph. For an Eleven, the Commander of the Tokyo-3 Branch is quite the worthy opponent.'

Upon receiving word of her transfer with Unit-05, the Fourth Child's response had been reportedly something along the lines of "YES YES YES YES YES I'M SO HAPPY I COULD KISS _CORNELIA_!"

Seeing the scowl on the Second Princess's face, however, she decided not to and instead turned to the thirteen year-old Euphemia and planted a big wet one on her lips that lasted for five seconds. Quite worryingly, one of the Knights present mentioned that he thought the Princess was starting to get kind of into it before Mari broke off.

The Emperor had ordered Captain Guame to be promptly shot and then used as food for the royal goldfish under the care of Prince Clovis.

* * *

><p><em>2012; path to Shinji's school – San Francisco, California, USA (one month later)<em>

Walking together as they often did, Shinji Ikari and Gate Thompson were discussing things on the way to school, generally along the lines of who would win in an all-out brawl between Solid Snake, Batman, Hulk Hogan, and Presidential candidate Simon "the Digger" Teppelin.

Shinji asked, "So does Senator Teppelin get Lagann?"

"If he did, he'd be too awesome for the others to stand a chance. Even Batman can't prepare for a force of nature as badass as Simon the Digger in his mecha. Well, the Adam West version probably could, but we're using the Batman from The Dark Knight trilogy."

Just before Shinji could reply, a feminine voice called out from behind them.

"Hey, Shinji!"

Surprised, Shinji Ikari immediately turned around to face whomever was speaking to him…

And almost before he realized it, a cute girl his age with brown hair, glasses, and an impressive chest for her age had locked lips with him, taking a second or two to explore his mouth with her tongue.

Soon enough, she released her hold on the stunned young man as she licked her lips and said with an arrogant smirk, "Seeya later, stud."

With that, the hyperactive, slightly red-faced girl left, almost skipping off in the same direction that the two boys were headed in.

It took a full five seconds before Shinji's brain finally managed to boot itself back up.

'Weird girl shows up out of nowhere and, with practically no warning at all, kisses me. … NO FREAKING WAY.'

As the realization dawned upon him, Shinji began to laugh. At first, it was a low chuckle, before growing into a full-bodied laugh so fierce that Shinji had to lean on his friend to keep from falling on his ass.

Concerned, Gate thought to himself, 'Holy crap I've never seen him laugh this hard. I… I think she broke him somehow!'

What he said, however, was "You were already the coolest friend I could' ve asked for… and then you pull a stunt like this on me. I am officially unworthy to stand in your presence. _BRO. FIST._"

The two friends lightly bumped their fists once Shinji regained his composure, though he asked, "Okay, now that I'm calm enough to pay attention, what's this about you mistaking me for being cool?"

Shaking his head, Gate replied, "No mistakes about it, dude. Total _babe_ neither of us has seen before glomps you out of nowhere, then starts skipping off towards our own school? What this means, my friend, is that we have a new transfer student of some sort, and she's already got the hots for you before her first day here has officially begun. Where're my cute girls coming to glomp me out of nowhere? Heck, I'd be _ecstatic_ if a _mildly_ attractive young lady walked up and said _hi_."

Shrugging, Shinji could only apologize and say, "Actually, if that girl is whom I very strongly suspect her to be, then we already have a prior history of sorts. If I'm right in who I remember her to be… then what just happened is more a result of her being crazy than me being in any way cool."

Nodding, Gate said, "I see. So… if it's not too embarassing, mind if you told me what kind of history you two have?"

His mind still a few miles away in memoryland, Shinji replied, "She walked up and proposed to me when we were four and then kissed me on the lips."

Looking at his friend and then at the girl's now-distant back, Gate shook his head and said, "Well for your sake, I dearly hope she hasn't turned into some kind of psychotic stalker since then. That would royally suck, you know? Grew up to be a massive hottie, though."

Chuckling nervously, Shinji said, "Somehow I doubt that's the case, but I hope so too."

With that, the pair of friends went on into their school.

Just before they parted ways to go to their separate homerooms, though, Gate said, "You're still the coolest dude I know, though."

* * *

><p>Just moments after the bell to be seated rang, their teacher declared, "We have a transfer student coming in today. Please introduce yourself, Miss Makinami."<p>

With an arrogant smirk, the young woman from before proceeded to strut through the classroom door and up to the board, where gripped a piece of chalk and in large, exaggerated motions, wrote out her name upon it. Then, she rapidly turned on the back of her heel to face the class, sunlight glinted off of her glasses as her twin ponytails whipped around her face from inertia.

Her smirk morphing into an all-out grin, the girl dramatically drew her hand over her impressive (for a twelve-year-old) chest as she said, "Mari. Illustrious. Makinami. _Starstruck_, right?"

* * *

><p><strong>Um… yeah. So then… Asuka is a fusion of herself, canon Shinji, and canon Rei? Rei herself has yet to make an appearance, despite her massive fandom? <strong>

**And now a reply to someone who won't let me PM them!**

**Xenoguyver: I'd forgotten to mention it, but yeah, Shinji's speech in the last chapter is best if you have "Yuusha-Oh Tanjou!" playing as background music, although it won't be quite fitting for all of his fights. As for that other thing, I will instead have Shinji knowingly reference a different anime for his Hot Blooded Finishing Move. Hammer-oriented, of course.**

**Also, the omake here is canon, as will most other omake be. It's not necessarily plot-relevant, just a peek into the daily lives of the characters and also into the world of Neon Knights. And this little short is absolutely not the Disgaea equivalent of DOUBLE K.**

Omake

As Adell entered the police station, he was greeted with a wave by his best friends on the force – a man with long, dark blue hair and a short, flat-chested blonde who looked like she was fifteen.

The trio were also the only three members of the department that were completely straight-laced. Everyone else was so corrupt that it wrapped all the way around the morality gauge and became legitimate.

"Hey there! Mao over at forensics finished up the DNA tests from that murder the other night, and he wants you to go collect the results in person."

Rolling his eyes, Adell briefly thought to himself about how both the San Francisco Police Department and NERV-America were run by crazy people.

"Thanks Almaz, but I need to have a talk with the boss first. I'll go check it out afterward."

The woman, Flonne, said, "I don't know if that's such a good idea, he's still asleep right now…"

With a brief facepalm, Adell groaned and said, "Goddamnit. Okay, one of you find me the C-4, I'll wake him up."

After having the second-in-command pick the lock on the door to the Chief's rather spacious office, Adell duct taped the plastic explosive to his boss's face, then went back out and triggered the detonator.

The explosion was immediately drowned out by a roar as the inhabitant of that office picked up his desk and threw it at the first person he could see. The attack was ineffective, however, as Adell immediately intercepted the flying projectile and shattered it into countless splinters with a single punch.

And then, unscathed save for a just-barely charred eyebrow, the half-pint tyrant of the SFPD emerged, disproportionate broadsword in hand. With a furious glare, he cast his gaze about the office, cowing his numerous and terrified subordinates into submission as he snarled, "What fool DARES to awaken the great Police Chief Laharl?"

[cue "Ode to King Laharl" instrumental version, _Disgaea Hour of Darkness_]


End file.
